Thursday, August 30, 2007
Today started out to be what my Grandmother always called "a pea soup day." It was foggy and cold and I was certain Autumn was upon us. Fortunately it warmed up nicely because even though I've started working on Halloween items I am not ready for summer to end. I kind of feel as if I'm owed another month's worth since we had rain nearly every afternoon in August. Mother Nature can be capricious, keeping us on our toes in Colorado, some years are just like that with rain all summer. I remember a few years back it was in the 80's in the early part of December. I've even seen snow in July.
Anyway I have been getting increasingly excited. I am FINALLY going to put together a website. It's something I should have done long, long...LONG ago, but something seems different now. I am ready. I am not sure why I wasn't ready before, I just wasn't. Something intangible feels different to me. It's hard to explain.
I have barely been able to sleep because my over wrought brain has been working hard trying color combinations and clever backgrounds and fonts and logos and hang tags and shipping labels, oh my! Thrown into the mix are about a bazillion and two new ideas for bears and other critters which I want to try all today, right this minute.....NOW! *Laughs* I know exactly what I want to do, of course I knew what I wanted to do yesterday, and last week, and a few days before that...and it always changes because there are so many wonderful things I could do. My husband says I am in a "creative snit," and a friend says I have a "storm in my brain" which I really find funny. It conjurs up a much better visual to say it that way rather than a brain storm. In fact I am off in just a second to let some of the storm bluster away.
I just wanted to take a moment and post. I find I like posting to the blog, it's sort of calming and fun. Especially now that I know two people are reading it. I am really surprised by that. I don't know why, I have been reading other people's blogs for a long time. It's a funny dynamic to never know where you are in the world. I used to feel this way at shows. I would go to a well established show and think people would know right off who I was, only to have them say "Now who are you again?" It's so humbling, but I think we need that good swift kick in the ego sometimes. Then I would go to a new show in a remote area thinking people wouldn't have a clue who I was and be treated like royalty. I guess that's part of the job description. At least I know who I am, and that's a good thing. Right now I know I am a woman who has a full force gale building up in her brain!
Tuesday, August 28, 2007
I was hoping to have a lot of nice cheery posts in a row since anyone who might stumble upon this and read it doesn't know me and will think I am very depressing. But I am not going to be able to do that just yet. It's been a tough month. Yesterday I had to have my dear sweet Shelby cat put to sleep. Now I know ultimately it was the right thing to do. She was old and had gone blind but she was doing very well, anyway until Saturday. Saturday as near as I can tell she had a stroke. If it wasn't that, then something else went horribly wrong somewhere, and she was having trouble standing up, eating, breathing and even being aware of where she was. So yes, it was the right thing to do because I couldn't let her suffer, and I am very certain she probably wouldn't have made it more than a few days longer. The one in this who I am sad for is myself. But that's always the way of death, it's the ones left behind that feel the pain. When someone or something shares a big part of your life for 16 years you can't help but feel a horrible hole in your heart and your life. As far as cats go, she was incredibly intelligent and intuitive to my wants and needs. She was funny with a cocky attitude right from the moment she strolled in our door despite malnutrition. For the first few weeks she slept curled around the food dish because she was afraid it might empty and not be refilled. Once she figured out that there would always be food, she set about becoming queen of her little kingdom. Even the giant chows always deferred to her wishes. She learned a couple clever tricks, being able to say "mama" and "milk." She even won me a camera once by taking first place when I entered her in a cute kitty contest. I miss my friend. Anyone who has never had a pet, or doesn't have a natural affinitiy for animals wouldn't probably understand being friends with one. But it's definitely possible and a shame that some people miss out on that special type of friendship. You never get that kind of unconditional affection from another human being no matter how much they might love and care about you. I will miss that little scrap of fur, and even though I have two others, there will never be another Shelby. Rest in peace, I will miss you! Shelby ~ 1991-2007