If you are a regular reader of my blog, then you know that I throw everything out there when it comes to topics. The good, the bad and the ugly. There are a couple things I rarely discuss however. One is sex. To me that's personal, and not fodder for public consumption.
The other is romance in general. Today though, I am going to wade out into those piranha infested waters. While I have been known to give all sorts of advice on deaing with members of the opposite sex to friends, I don't really feel comfortable giving it to the masses, because I don't want that responsibility.
However, this week I learned a huge secret. I simply have to share it with you. But let me back up a little.
Now ladies, we have all been here...you are out somewhere in public and a man suddenly appears. Oh but not just any man...an incredibly attractive man. When you spotted this paragon of male pulchritude, what did you do next? Did you try to talk to him? Did you simply admire him quietly from afar? Did you run away feeling intimidated? Chances are you have done one, two or even all three of these things at some point. If you weren't successful, read on...
Earlier this week I went shopping, and I ran into a man who works in a shop and who I have met before. We will call him J. J is incredibly good looking. Male model good looking. The kind of good looking that makes you forget your own name for a minute. And he used to be an archaeologist. Move over Indiana Jones!
He is also ten years younger than I am. At 48 I am getting older, and I am not a thin girl anymore. But J is always so nice to me. He always carries on a conversation with me longer than he probably should since he is working. This time he was telling me about his latest trip, and I was suggesting other places he should visit. He even gave me a discount that he didn't have to give me. I always assumed of course all this was because it was part of his job. However I had a chance to witness several other women interacting with him this time. These women were young, thin and pretty, so it makes sense he would react more favorably to them. But he didn't. In fact he was polite, but rather standoffish towards them. He barely spoke to them. I was puzzled. They didn't do or say anything wrong from what I could see, and they were clearly interested in him.
I thought about this for a while. I know a good number of really attractive men, and they all seem to respond well to me. So I started to wonder why...I am happily married so there is no potential for them to be anything more than eye candy...maybe that's the reason why? I am no threat.
I wanted an expert opinion though. I decided to go to a male friend I have had for a very long time. He is attractive and he has known me long enough to be honest. I asked him about this. I said why me?
The answer surprised me. He said "Oh that's easy." I asked him how so? He said it was because of two simple things...one was that it's easy to tell that I geuinely like men and I accept them just as they are. And two, he said when it comes to attractive men, I treat them like everyone else.
I was a little bit confused about his answers. I said of course like men and I treat them like everyone else. He said no you don't get all stupid and tongue tied. He said you treat them the same as you would any average Joe off the street instead of putting them on a pedestal like a Greek god. (I am paraphrasing because he used a little more colorful expression.) He went on to tell me that he can't stand it when women act all nervous and brain dead around him because of his looks. He said it was surpising how many women really resent and even hate men at the subconscious level. He also said that's why he and I became friends in the first place, because he didn't get that resentment vibe and I could carry on a conversation without being nervous or intimidated.
Who knew it was that simple? So there you have it, the next time you run into an Adonis in the wild...treat him like a mere mortal and he will respond favorably to you!