Nearly everyone has some odd little facets to their personality that is completely incongruous with who they are and what the people in their lives know about them. Now if you're like me, you have kept those things secret because if someone caught you engaging in them you wouldn't know how to explain yourself.
Until this morning I had such a secret. Something that I had never told a living soul. Now R is pretty used to my quirks...and there are many. So very little surprises him. But this was something that I just never shared with him. I have always been able to get away with it, without being caught because it's an occasional thing I only do once every year or two.
Last night was rather odd all the way around anyway. For starters I would have sworn, sworn, sworn I saw Shelby twice. Once in the living room and once in the foyer. But that is impossible because Shelby was a cat I used to have. She passed on a couple years ago. I don't know why I thought I saw her, I hadn't even really been thinking about her.
The second odd thing was while I was microwaving a can of tomato soup for lunch, (I have lunch about 11 PM since my schedule is different than the rest of the world) I was standing perfectly still in the kitchen, flat footed and all of a sudden it was as if someone pulled a rug out from under me and I nearly fell on my backside. Luckily for once I didn't. Now I know I am extremely clumsy but I was standing STILL!
The oddest thing of all, right around 1 AM it felt as if someone just sucker punched me right in the back of the rib cage. I don't know what I did. I didn't run into anything and I didn't move wrong and pull a muscle. It was very strange, and today it's so sore I can barely move my arm.
So I decided there was really only one thing left to do...now I was certain I would get away with it again without being caught...and I would have if R hadn't uncharacteristically gotten up five minutes early. He wandered out of the bedroom, squinted at the TV and said "What on earth are you watching?!"
I froze like a deer caught in headlights. I didn't know what to do. What should I say? Should I deny it and claim I hadn't meant to? Should I fess up? Should I turn the TV off and run? Finally I said very quietly: "Er...um...a...a kung fu movie." He just gave me a quizzical look, shook his head and wandered to the kitchen to make coffee.
It's true, for about 30 years now I have been watching that rare kung fu movie in secret. I can't make anyone understand it, because I don't understand it. But I do believe that every single thing in the entire universe right down to the tiniest detail makes perfect sense in the big picture even if it's not apparent to us as to why.
I do have a bit of good news to share too...I don't know if he picked up on my feelings or it was merely coincidence but Ridley decided to back off a little yesterday. He let everyone else have attention and didn't stick to me like glue all day.
He managed to pass three important tests in the last 24 hours. As mentioned above he decided to share. Also Gypsy bolted out the door with the dogs yesterday and he was off after her like a rocket. I was terrified he would grab her and either hurt her or kill her. While he hasn't been aggressive with the cats, he also didn't seem to understand what they were and I wasn't sure of his intent. But when he caught up to her, he just started running around her in a circle wagging his tail and doing that doggie bow that implies they want to play...so second test passed.
Lastly, today I had to go out and leave him home without supervision this afternoon for the first time since he has been here. I was gone for two and a half hours because I had to drop Jazzy off at the groomers, run errands and hit the store. I wasn't sure what I would find when I got home, but nothing was amiss. He had behaved like a gentleman with the furniture and the cats...so he gets to stay and doesn't have to go back.
Somehow I think he knows he passed the tests, because he is happily asleep with a big doggie grin on his face. Of course...he could just be dreaming about chasing rabbits.
Hugs, K. <3