Terror (Not A Post For The Squeamish)

I don't have a fear of the dentist the way most people do. I have had several fillings, two root canals, all my wisdom teeth and an impacted molar pulled, and a crown. None of it really phased me a whole lot. The doctor scares me much more than the dentist.

However this Thursday I am finally going to the oral surgeon for gum grafts. I was supposed to go in June, and put it off because you can't eat normally for a few weeks and it takes a full nine months to completely heal. Summer involves BBQ's and trips and I didn't want to have to deal with it. Plus I thought it would be easier to handle during soup weather.

Apparently I brush my teeth too hard and it has worn away my gums on the four corners. I have to be honest...I am just terrified. It all sounds so Frankenstein-esque.

Before they suggested this, I had never heard of gum grafts. I figured if your gums receded that was that. I was both happy and nervous to find out they can fix it.

This is your last chance to turn back, I am going to get graphic now, so if it bothers you...don't read any further!

The procedure involves making a vertical slit in your gum, and then they slide a piece of "human tissue material on a synthetic matrix" under there and stitch it closed. After nine months your own tissue takes over and the original is gone.

The human tissue material sounds really disturbing. He assured me that no one has ever had any problems with it ever. Let's hope I am not the first. The stitches part is bothering me too. I have issues with anything unnatural going into my skin, this includes needles. It's a miracle I have pierced ears or two small tattoos.

Another issue I have is that I never get numb at the dentist. They never believe me either. Luckily this guy did. He said some people have very deep set nerve endings and sometimes dentists don't get far enough up with the Novocain to numb them. The next time I find a disbelieving dentist I am going to mention that! It would save the extra expense and risk of having IV sedation or the pain of just grinning and bearing it...which I have had to do a couple times.

They also want me to take a Xanax before I go in. I have never taken a Xanax and that makes me a bit nervous as well. Sometimes drugs effect me in strange ways other than how they are supposed to, and I am not sure what a Xanax will do to me.

The girl on the phone reassured me it was no big deal and they do it all the time. Well ok...they do it all the time...I don't! So to me it's pretty terrifying.

I am trying to be that brave, tough girl I am...and I am failing miserably. I wasn't this scared over my shoulder surgery, hand surgery or my hysterectomy. Maybe it's because for those, I knew I would sleep through it.

So as we draw near to Thursday, my posts might get a little odd...if they do, just know it's the terror talking!

Monday Inspiration: Coffee With A Friend

When I was a little girl it was nothing unusual for someone to stop by for coffee at my Grandmother's or my Mother's house. Later when I was in college we always went out for coffee to chat and study. Even later still, my best friend and I would always stop for coffee after a night out of dancing. For years after we moved here I had another friend who I would meet for coffee at least once a week, and sometimes as many as four times a week. Sadly she was much older than I and she is gone now.

Every time I read Artful Blogging I am convinced that I am not doing it right. Maybe I should quit reading it. People tell stories of their blogs and how they strive to inspire people every single day, or how their blogs are personal journeys of a spiritual nature or self discovery. Some of them try to teach about their art and share their techniques. Other post amazing pictures they take and beautify the world at large. Whatever the story is behind each blog featured, it's always something huge and monumental...life changing even. It makes me feel bad, as if I am lacking by not doing that.

I would love to write something like that. But I can't, I don't know how. Maybe I don't view my blog in the right way, and that's why I can't. I am not sure.

When I sit down to make a post, I almost always have a cup of coffee...I figure it's the best time to post since I am taking a break and not focused on anything else. It's a little bit of time to relax. I approach it from the perspective of sitting down with a friend to have coffee. If I was having coffee with a friend, I would talk about what I did or needed to do that day, something that irked me or made me afraid, something that I thought was cute or funny, something that I got fascinated with, or simply show my friend my latest piece of work.

I am pretty sure I have never changed anyone's life over coffee in the past, and I probably won't ever do it through my blog. Sometimes I do make self discoveries through what I write, but I have never considered it a journey to be taken...more like a nice surprise I wasn't expecting.

I start off each week with Monday Love or Monday Inspiration, but those are more things that I love or inspire me than I expect them to inspire you. I just like to try to start the week off on a positive note.

Neighbors may not drop in to each others houses anymore for coffee like they used to, and I may not meet up with my friends in the real world much any more since they all live so far away, but I have made some lovely friends through blogging and I look forward to having coffee with them for a few minutes each day through this medium.

When I first started blogging, I wasn't sure I would keep doing it. I had tried keeping a regular journal in the past and always gave up after a few weeks. So when I came to blogging I didn't know what to expect of myself. I didn't know what to say, or if anyone would ever read it. But then again, when I had my first cup of coffee I wasn't sure if I was going to like it, or what to put in that either.

I may never type anything huge or monumental, and may not be following some mystical formula...but maybe I am doing ok anyway? I wouldn't trade those hours spent with many a friend over coffee, and I wouldn't trade my time blogging with you either.

The Little Green Dog

R is out mowing the grass for what may possibly be the last time this year. When he goes out to mow he always has his two little "helpers." Jazzy loves to chase after him the entire time and my snowy white little dog ends up turning green. Buster just lays in the grass and watches after two or three trips across the yard because of his back problems. He has two compressed discs.

The last time she did it, I hadn't noticed how green she really was and I took her for a walk. A guy pulled over and yelled out the window of his pickup that he had never seen a green dog before! *Grins* She had been so enthusiastic that even her face was green last time! She doesn't care though, it's worth it I guess for the fun of chasing the mower, nlot to mention she is right for the season with her "Frankenpaws!"

Just Another Neurotic Episode From The Life Of An Artist

Some years ago R and I decided to redecorate the guest room. We got a lovely daybed, quilts, some beautiful book cases, a vintage table and a tiffany lamp. We wall papered the room in a nice floral to give it a warm homey feel. We also decided to put in new carpet. We found a discontinued piece of very thick velvety pile at a good price and R bought the whole roll.

As it turned out there was enough on the roll to also do my work room next door. I decided that if R was going to put new carpet in the work room, I wanted to fresco paint it first. I thought a nice rich carmelly parchment look would be just the thing since I don't really care for cool colors in my house. I like it to have a warm feeling. I painted the ceiling and the doorways a periwinkle. Now I am sure that might sound odd...but I wanted it to look like Mexico under a night sky. It's very pretty.

Little did I know what I was in for when I started the project. Now when you have been in business nearly 3 decades you tend to amass a lot of supplies for your work. I am never going to run out of lace, silk flowers, ribbons, buttons, findings, beads and a whole assortment of other doodads...not ever. Then of course I have the basic bear components which include hardware, mohair by the tubs full, stuffing supplies, etc. On top of all that my work room also houses my bear collection, dozens of books, a dress makers dummy, a small scale version of stone henge, a castle and a whole host of other curiosities. Oh yeah...and my sewing machine and work table, a pie safe, desk and hutch, several trunks and an amoire.

By the time I got it all boxed up, the room painted with paint that R bought which was a nice paint...but didn't really lend itself to fresco painting and reduced me to tears of frustration a couple times, carpet put in and everything unpacked and put back, it took three months.

I organized everything nicely when I put it away. Before that it was sort of stored in shelves and boxes and drawers in a rather neat but eclectic way. I knew where every single thing I owned was too. Since I organized it years ago I haven't been able to find a thing I want when I want it.

Yesterday I finally decided it was time to clean up the work room again. In particular the closet. *Bangs her head on the desk for a moment* I took half the stuff out of my overly full closet and realized with horror that I am never going to get it all back in. (Ok I will but it's quite intimidating to have it all out) The closet is full of plastic tubs filled with mohair and ribbons and other supplies, and my very large assortment of hat boxes. There are also bags of things...tulle, crinkle paper, velvet fruits, unpainted wooden boxes, hats, doll clothes, and the list goes on. Most of those things are in multiple colors or large groups because I had an idea at the time I bought them.

Some of those ideas came to fruition and some haven't...yet. When I put it all back the first time I thought it would be easy to find if I grouped like things together. I was wrong. Apparently my brain can't process such a concept. I am going to have to figure out a new system that will allow me to find what I want. Maybe if I colorize things like my clothes closet...I never have any trouble finding what I want in there.

I have considered making nice groupings of supplies in little boxes or bags and selling them in my Etsy shop. My only concern with doing that is the moment I sell something I am sure I will find out a week later I needed that particular thing.
I guess I will decide once I start putting it all back and can fully assess what I have.

My dream is to have a little stone cottage out back, separate from the house where I can work and keep all my stuff. Even though it never spills over into the rest of the house, I would like to have something I design the way I want it with shelves, cupboards and everything I need to stay organized and find what I want easily.

I should have worked on it tonight, but somehow watching a little TV and making this blog post seemed much more appealing. Sigh~

Archipelago

I really love old movies, especially musicals. "The Glass Slipper" with Leslie Caron is one I have seen several times and enjoy. My favorite character was Mrs. Toquet, played by the fabulous Estelle Winwood as the eccentric version of a fairy godmother who likes to "borrow" things.

When she first meets "Cinder-ella," she says she likes the sound of her name because it's as much fun to say as elbow, windowsill, pickle relish and apple dumpling. For some reason that left a lasting impression on me.

Whenever I run across a word that I find fun to say, I think of Mrs. Toquet. This afternoon I took a little break to read a chapter in my book, and came across the word arhipelago. Every time I see that word I have to say it out loud a couple times. That is a very fun word to say! It rolls off the tongue and brings up all sorts of fanciful visuals that have nothing to do with what it means.

I also like the word Algonquin. In fact I liked it so much that I named a little bear that once. Maybe there will be an "Archipelago" arriving soon? Don't worry though, he won't be in a cluster!

What words do you find fun to say? Maybe if you share a few they will turn into names for bears! In the mean time, try to catch the movie if you haven't seen it. I believe it pops up on TCM channel every once in a while.

Just One Hour

Yesterday I woke up and hit the ground running. Ok well maybe it was more of a brisk walk, but still. I got up, changed the bedding, washed the sheets, went to the gym, went to the grocery store, did a little cleaning, washed dishes, fed myself in there somewhere, played with the dogs, finished the cubcake, photographed it, did the graphics for the give away, (see previous post) watered my jungle, had a bath and fell into bed.

Today I after having slept well for once, I got up and looked out the window. It was another beautiful day with bright blue skies and sunshine. I decided I would take a quiet hour for myself just to dust out my brain and rejuve a bit.(something I rarely do) I got my coffee to head out to the deck. I opened the door and walked out, then turned right around and walked back in. It was false advertising on Mother Nature's part! It was cold and windy! I was rather disappointed, I hate days that are deceptive like that, I always feel sort of cheated somehow.

However I decided I would still take my hour...just one hour...one lovely peaceful hour. I crawled under the quilt on the sofa with my coffee and a couple pretty magazines. I settled in and turned on a show I recorded a few days ago I had been wanting to watch. I was about ten minutes in when the phone rang. My Mother was having computer problems. She had already called about five minutes after I woke up.

Now it's not that I mind helping her, it's just that sometimes it's difficult to explain how to handle issues over the phone, especially when the person isn't computer savvy. So I helped her the best I could, and settled back in. Five minutes later R called to tell me he was on the way home and was stopping for a haircut.

Back to the sofa and my quilt...ahhh. It wasn't even two minutes later when Buster came and gave me the mournful puppy eyed look that signals he has to go potty. You couldn't tell me before I sat back down??? More sad eyes...I guess not. *Groan* Up the stairs I went to let them out.

Back to the sofa, and a door slams followed by pitiful meowing. Gypsy has an odd habit of shutting herself in the bathroom every once in a while. She instantly freaks out at the thought of being locked in every time she does it too.

Off to rescue kitty...back to the sofa...the doorbell rings. Someone trying to sell me aluminum siding that ignored my no soliciting sign.

At this point I gave up. I think it's impossible to have just one peaceful hour...sigh~ Sadly on the days when I wish for activity and phone calls there aren't any. Why is it always like that?

October Blog Give Away!

What better way to start off the month than by giving away one of my little cubcakes! I made another Pumpkin Cubcake and he might be yours...all you have to do to enter is post on your blog about my give away and leave me a comment letting me know. The winner will be chosen at random on the 15Th and will arrive just in time for Halloween! Readers from all parts of the world are welcome to enter! Good luck!

Hugs, K. <3