Friday, February 24, 2012

An Experiment In Worry ~ No One Is Keeping Score

Before I launch into my topic at hand, I want to tell you that Dralion was AMAZING!   If you get the opportunity to go see it, by all means do so.  Having the front row seats were so great.  You could see every detail of the costumes, the wonderful.  So much inspiration.  I also got "petted" by one of the clowns.  It was funny and he was adorable.

Ok so on to the topic at hand...yesterday I decided to conduct a little Facebook experiment.  I made the following post:

"I am conducting a little experiment. So if you read this post, would you please hit the like button. I am going to do another post later and I am asking that you don't hit the like button on that one. I will explain after the fact what I was doing. Thanks!"
22 people hit the like button.  Considering I posted that at about 5:30 AM MST, I found that to be an impressive number.

About 6-7 hours later I posted the picture shown above without any explanation.  18 people hit the like button on that post.  A good number  of the people who hit the like button on the second post were the same ones who read the first post and hit the like button.  Now please understand I was in no way trying to embarrass anyoneHad it been me, I probably would have done the same thing.  I was just curious to see how long people would retain what they read.

So why was I doing thatMany of my posts are based on conversations I witness or participate in with other artists.  So this post is based on something some artists were discussing and worrying over.

I read a quote long ago that said 90% of all the things people worry about never come true.  I believe that to be fairly accurate.  All too often we worry over little things needlessly.  One of the main things I see artists worrying about are the things they say or that are said about them online.  There is a concern that it will be misconstrued or misinterpreted, and that people will remember what was said forever!  That somehow it will effect our business or how others view us.

I want you to think about the last few things you read and the pics you saw on Facebook, Twitter or a Blog?  Do you remember what they were?  I have an exceptional memory and I don't remember most of them.  I don't even remember everything I posted.  It's not that people are not interested in what we have to say, or in us.  It's just that people read it and then think about picking their kids up from school or what to make for dinner...they have their own lives that take precedent above what we are doing all the time.  That's the way it should be. While people do like our work and are curious about us sometimes, we don't have the kind of influence we may like to think we do.  That's a good thing!  I certainly don't think I am that big of an influence on anyone's life.  Too much pressure!  *grins*

When we post something, and then circumstances they do once in a while in everyone's lives and we have to contradict what we had previously said, no one is keeping score unless we do it every single time, which most of us don't.

When we make some sort of faux pas, people usually look past it to see who we are as a whole, especially if they have been friends or loyal followers.  They may even think ill of us for a moment or two, but most of them are not keeping score.  Nor do they hold grudges forever when they realize that we are not inherently bad people.

When someone else posts something less than favorable about us, whether they name us by name or can seem devastating at the time.  It seems as if everyone saw and they are judging us whether we did what we were accused of or not.  But the truth is, only a small handful of people ever see anything that is posted online.  They remember it about as long as they do reading something less than favorable about a movie star in a tabloid in the grocery store check out line.  No one is keeping score.  If they are, they may not want to throw stones at glass houses because we all do these things at some point.

We are human beings...we are flawed and fallible.  We will make mistakes, we will be sorry for them, we will try to learn from them, we will be forgiven by the people who like us and our work.  We will be talked about at times, like it or not.  It will not ruin our businesses, it will not ruin our reputations if we are good, honest, hard working people most of the time.

No one is going to think less of us for not being perfect or selling every single thing we make within five minutes of posting it.  Business doesn't always work that way.  It doesn't mean our work is bad, it just means that the right person for that bear hasn't found it yet.

So the next time this happens to you, and you are worrying or losing sleep over it...please don't.  Just be your sweet, lovable self and move on, let it go.  I promise you...hardly anyone saw it, and if they one is keeping score!

Hugs, K. <3

Tuesday, February 21, 2012

Fat Tuesday

Anyone who has ever met me in real life will tell you that for better or worse, I am pretty much exactly the same online as I am off.  I am very straight forward because I don't like to hide behind things or play games.  So it's a curious side of my personality that I am so fascinated by masks.   I just love them, I have quite a few around the house, and sometimes late at night I wear them just for the fun of it.  (You know you would love to be a fly on the wall and see what kinds of crazy things really do go on in this house!)  Perhaps it stems from my romantic side that loved those fairy tales as a kid, where the suitor shows up at the masquerade in disguise and eventually reveals themselves to the would be love interest and they live happily ever after.  Or maybe it's the fact that a mask allows you to be mysterious for a while...something that I am really not.

Today is Fat Tuesday and of course that involves carnivale and costumes and MASKS!  I had such a lovely time this morning scrolling through an article online about Mardi Gras celebrations around the world.

I have never been to a Mardi Gras celebration, but I would dearly love to go just to gawk at all the fabulousness.  If I could choose I would go to the one in Venice.  If you're going to go...go big!

I will get a tiny bit of a carnivale-esque celebration tomorrow night anyway because we are going to see Dralion at the World Arena.  R knows how much I absolutely adore Cirque du Soleil and he was so sweet in getting us front row center tickets!   I literally have been willing myself to get over this nasty head cold so that I can enjoy the show.  It seems to be working.

I have been eating muy caliente jalapenos, drinking tea and brandy, taking my meds and getting rest so I can be in good shape to go!  I just can't wait.

I hope you all have a lovely Fat Tuesday...but don't eat too much! 

Thursday, February 16, 2012

Valentines Day And Sale

Valentines Day was pretty low key, but R did surprise me with roses.  I thought that was pretty sweet.  I would have rather had him than the roses, but you take what you can get!  I spent the day watching my Pirate movies and working on show pieces.

The next morning I woke up feeling dreadful.  My throat hurt and I was completely hoarse with a wracking cough.  R's plane came in at 9:06 PM, and I was determined to go get him.  He offered to take a cab, but there was no way I was going to let him do that.  He was pretty happy to be home.  He brought me the cute pin above from the Hard Rock Cafe in San Antonio.  I loved it!  He knows me so was pink and had hearts and wings!  Years ago I had a Hard Rock Cafe pin that I had gotten on a spur of the moment trip to Chicago.  That was back in the old days when I would just hop in the car and drive a thousand miles for a cheeseburger and a pin!   It was on my jean jacket for years, and then at some point I lost it.  So he replaced it!

I flopped into bed last night about 10 PM and slept til 3 AM, I went back to bed at 7 AM and got up at 3 PM.  I am feeling better and am going to work for a bit before going back to bed.  Tomorrow I have a busy day, first a massage, then the chiropractor.    I am looking forward to the massage, but not the acupuncture.  Last week he poked my hand too hard and left it bruised and swollen.

This weekend we are going to dinner and a movie to make up for no fun on Valentines Day.  Other than that...I will be working away!

Also I am having a 1/3 off sale on everything on my website for the next 48 hours for my blog followers.  If you would like a piece, please send me your paypal e-mail address and I will send you an invoice.  You can visit my website at  It's first come first serve.

Have a lovely weekend!  Hugs, K.

Tuesday, February 14, 2012

Carpe Diem

I would like to start by wishing you all a Happy Valentines Day!  Valentines Day is my second favorite holiday behind Christmas.  It's a whole day in honor of love, and I am a hopeless romantic.  So what better day to say carpe diem!   I am finding it interesting that I have this attitude because for the first time in many, many years I am spending it alone.  R had to go out of town for work, and so we are separated.  He will return tomorrow.   Distance doesn't diminish love by any stretch though, and while I was sad at first...I am ok with it.  I have plans to spend the day with Johnny Depp and Orlando Bloom by having a Pirates Of The Caribbean movie marathon and sewing.

Yesterday I went out and ran some errands, and while I was out I picked up the latest issue of "Where Women Create."  I read an article about being confident.  Oddly enough I have been thinking a bit on that very subject recently.  Last week someone told me that people are drawn to me because of my confidence.  So naturally I had to ponder that.  I don't think I am all that confident in a lot of ways...afterall I am a classic neurotic artist.  But perhaps at this stage of life I have become comfortable with all that I am, and am not, including the neurotic part.  Maybe that's what they were referring to?

The article said that confidence is the quality that makes us most attractive.  I think I agree with that.  People that we tend to find attractive in some way are usually not those with super model good looks...but rather those people who exude a confidence in who they are and what they are capable of.

We have all encountered people here and there who are just "cool" no matter what they do.  I have come across those people several times.  One famous person who I think fits that bill is Lenny Kravitz.  I don't find him physically attractive per se', but he could be flossing his teeth and still be cool doing it.  Another is Phil Collins.  Not handsome, but oh so cool.  They truly exude confidence.

As artists, when we have longevity in our chosen field we become good at what we do.  But yet we can go to a show and suddenly feel very insecure,  we think everyone else has better work than we do.  Our normal confidence can fly right out the window.  Who knows, maybe Lenny and Phil have those same insecurities.

How do we gain confidence to start with?  Why can we suddenly lose it in an instant?  I think the answer to the first question is rather simple.  I think it's a matter of repetition of actions...whether it's putting on mascara everyday, making a thousand bears, or simply learning to accept ourselves as worthy for what we are right now this second.  When we become familiar with any process it becomes second nature and we feel confident in how we do it.  When we learn to love all that we are, without waiting for that "someday" when we get better at something, or lose ten pounds, or be nicer to our family then we become confident.  Now I don't want to mistake that with complacency.  I think it's important to always try to improve what you do and who you are...but acceptance that you are the very best you that you can be right this second is equally important.

What about the second question though?  Why is it that even when we are usually confident in who we are, that we can feel insecure when surrounded by our peers?  Actually I think that the answer to this one is simple too.  Whether you're at a show and you think everyone has better work than you, or whether you're just meeting a friend for lunch and think she has an amazing outfit and you suddenly feel's because we are too close to what we do.  We cannot step outside ourselves and see how others view us.   We may have a general sense of it, and we could be close...or we could be way off base.  That also varies from person to person who is viewing us.  For all we know our friend may think we look better than they do, and the other artists at the show might be feeling exactly the same as we do.  It's because we are so familiar with our own process, and we think maybe someone has a better one.

We only get one life, and one chance to live it.  It's up to you to make it amazing.  It's important to work on our confidence, and to not squander any opportunity.  I told you in earlier posts that this year was about taking risks for me.   The funny thing is, a friend pointed out that I have always been a risk taker who goes her own way.  That's how she sees me.  She too sees me as filled with self confidence.  But to me, she is the amazing one who I aspire to be like.  Ironic isn't it!

So my Valentines wish for you all is to love everyone in your life with absolute confidence, whether they are near or far.  Love yourself with absolute confidence, you and your work are wonderful and worthy and cool in your own way.  Seize the day and make it amazing for you and those you love!

Sunday, February 12, 2012

Wednesday, February 8, 2012

Tea Party

Hi everyone, I know I haven't been posting much.  R has been out of town all week.  He is coming home tomorrow and leaving again on Sunday.  I am going to be all alone on Valentines Day, for the first time in decades.  He isn't very happy about it either.  But I guess that's the price of being a valuable asset to the company.  I am proud of him, but I miss him.

I have been cleaning, working and exercising all there hasn't been much to tell.  The only outing I have coming up is a visit to Dr. de Sade (not his real name) Friday to let him turn me into a voodoo doll.  I have been going to a chiropractor for acupuncture every week.  It's not that enjoyable, but I do feel pretty good, so I guess it's working.

The next update will actually be the online show at coming up on March 23-25th.  I have been working hard and should have lots of nice pieces for you!

I will post again when I have something interesting to talk about!  In the mean time stay warm, and have a lovely day!

Hugs, Kelly

Sunday, February 5, 2012

Super Bowl

R watching the Super Bowl today with his little "lapdog" Ridley.  I know you have never seen a pic of him because he hates to have his pic taken.  But I forced him to hold still while I did it.  He wasn't very happy about it, but I told him you guys didn't believe he was real!
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